INTERRACIAL/INTERCULTURAL MARRIAGE: INDIAN MAN & CHINESE WOMAN 12 YEARS AND COUNTING
YOGI & LYDIA’S LOVE STORY
My name is Yogendran, or Yogi for short. My wife is Lydia. We have two beautiful daughters, Faith Anisha, 3, and Grace Anitha, who turns 1 in May. We hail from the sunny city, island of Singapore.
We are one of numerous interracial couples around the world. We hope to serve as a testimony that there is a blissful ending to be had for anyone who perseveres through the unique challenges, and the eventual joys that come with being in a mixed relationship. There was a documentary made a few years back about our journey, and marriage, which you can find on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?
HOW WE MET
We almost didn’t! Haha! Lydia had signed up for our university’s orientation camp in 2005, and days before the camp, my friend – who also happened to be a senior and the camp organizer – called me to say they had too many girls and not enough guys signing up. So he asked if I could do him a favor by joining the camp. In the end, I guess he did me a favor. Haha.. Lydia and I first got acquainted as members of the same orientation group, and complete strangers. But when you meet the right person, everything just falls in place. We were in a relationship after a mere 10 days, a relationship that is now set to last a lifetime.
HOW LONG HAVE WE BEEN TOGETHER
We have been together for 12 years, and married for 5 1/2 years.
TOP 4 TAKE AWAYS TO AN INTERRACIAL/INTERCULTURAL RELATIONSHIP
1.) If you are in a interracial relationship, you are bound to face some kind of resistance, no matter what you do or how nice you are. You can’t please everyone; someone is bound to be unhappy about your joy. Crucially, what others think about you is not as important as what you think of one another. The only good reason for you not being together should be if you find that you’re not in love with one another, and not because your dad doesn’t like him, or his mum doesn’t like you, or something like that. You get my drift?
So remember this: forget what looks right, forget what you think should be right, forget what your friends, parents, or others think is right, and ask yourself, “does the relationship feel right to me?” If the answer is yes, your relationship is perfectly fine.
2.) When my wife and I faced some resistance with our parents when dating in university, we made a resolution that we would study hard and get good grades together. And we eventually did. That helped our parents and those around us realize that our love for one another actually helped us achieve meaningful things. Likewise, find something fulfilling that you and your partner can share in and benefit from, that allows the people around you to see that you are serious about the relationship, and not just out to have fun. For instance, you can help out at a local charity, or do some community service together, or study and aim for good grades if you’re in the same university. Also, take time to know and appreciate each other’s culture and customs (a sure way to please your partner’s parents). You’ll also find that the shared activity will help strengthen your bond further, and that’s another plus.
3.) Communicate with your partner often, about anything and everything, even the smallest and most random things. Until now, my wife and I still talk about random, pointless stuff, as well as important stuff, before we go to bed at night. You’ll find communication can really help strengthen a relationship, especially a marriage. Both you and your partner must commit to keeping that communication channel open all the time. It’s very important, perhaps more important than any other aspect of a budding relationship.
4.) Finally, have fun! Interracial / intercultural relationships are wonderful, for you get the best of two cultures, languages, and everything else, so it’s double the joy, and worth experiencing. And if you settle down and have kids, you’ll be sure to raise interesting, deep and charismatic multiracial children who’ll be global citizens who see beyond color.
Thank you for sharing your story Yogi and Lydia! What do you think of their love story? Are you in an interracial/intercultural relationship? Feel free to share this post and comment below!
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