“Oh! Wasn’t there a big earthquake there recently that destroyed a lot of homes?”, asked my mom. “Yes, mum.”, I replied, again, keeping it short”. “Does he still have family there? I hope they’re okay.”, she sounded genuinely concerned. “They’re ok, mom. his Uncle’s family lives there but their house was unharmed. So… you’re ok with me dating him. I really like him. It might be serious and I definitely see this relationship having a future but of course, we’re not there yet—that’s not to say we won’t get there because we most likely will.” “Of course I’m ok with him! What’s not to be ok about?”, she chirped, “why do you ask? Dad and I trust you and if you think he’s the right one for you, then you have our support.”
I was surprised. The next 45 minutes or so flew by as I told them about how we met and giving them little details so they could paint a picture of him in their mind. After all, it would be long before they could visit us in the USA and I certainly had no plans of taking David to India in the near future. Over the next few months, I had Dave briefly chat with my parents over the phone/skype every once in a while. If you heard them talk, you couldn’t tell David wasn’t their own son.
OUR LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
Fast forward a year, I have now graduated and moved to Washington, D.C. where I found my dream job. Long distance dating was tough but not particularly horrible for us. After 2 years, when David graduated, he secured his dream job in the same company I was working for.
MOVING IN TOGETHER
My next big challenge was telling my parents Dave was going to move in with me. A complete shocker for Indian parents who cannot fathom a physical relationship before marriage. I knew I might be pushing my luck but the worse that could happen is that they would be mad at me and disapprove of my lifestyle. They still loved Dave and that wouldn’t change. I told them how it was important for us to live together specially after being apart for 2 years, only seeing each other once a month, to hone our relationship; to take the next step forward to figure where this was going. I heard the hesitation in my mom’s voice disappear when my father said, “I understand why this is important for you and there’s nothing wrong in it and I hope you know you don’t need our permission; you’re all grown up now and you live independently. I’m just very happy you thought it important to involve us in your life decisions. I hope that never changes and I wish you guys all the happiness.” Again, surprise but utter happiness took over and I excitedly called Dave to tell him about it. He was surprised too. “Your parents are awesome, babe”.